Travel - China

For Cats Only

May 28, 2006

One of the problems with personal guides is that they want to put a positive spin on their city and are highly sensitive to keep to a tight time schedule. Have only 3 days in Beijing? Then that leaves the Great Wall (half-day), the Summer Palace (half day) … and so on. Even when there may seem to be a couple of hours between stops, there was no way I was able to get any guide to take me fishing.

Suzhou, the “Venice of the East”, an hour outside Shanghai, was the closest I came. Traveling on one of the canal boats, we saw men, not only fishing with poles, but also traps: a large net, built like a scoop, with a long handle on a fulcrum post. Our guide, however, said this was not to put food on the table, but to feed … their cats.

Chinese guide humor:

What is the national bird of China?

Cranes .. you see them at all the new buildings going up (… ba-boom)

A bit more erudite:

An international economist at the UN went to address a group of children from all over the world. After everyone settled down, he asked them, “What is your opinion on the shortage of food in foreign countries?” There was a lot of murmuring, but no hands went up. So he asked them group by group what the problem was.

The African children said they were working on an idea, but they had to ask, “What is food?”

The European children had a similar problem. “What is shortage?”

The Asian children stumbled, “What is an opinion”?

Finally, coming to the Americans, they shook their heads, “What is a foreign country?”